18 Sept 2012

So i've been trying hard to get fantastic co curricular activities (CCA) points for my graduation testimonial. The only reason for me to continue striving real hard for my CCA sub committees are related to my being in SPOT. It's a program which i'm in that actually nurtures students to become leaders, communicators and humanitarians. I'm fantastic at being a humanitarian but not the rest.

You see, i know in my heart that i'm not the leader material and when given the choice, i'd rather relax and follow than lead. But at times, when i see things are not working, too slow or none too smoothly, i'm always tempted to tell people what to do. Thats when the difficulty comes in. I cant talk to save my life. I cant. I fumble and bumble (whatever the hell that is) and speak nonsensical stuff and stumble on my words. I dont know why but im scared they'll hate me for it. Plus, i'm always nervous from that.

So i got in to SPOT after much interviewing practice with my sister who is fantastic BTW and got in. I gotta tell you this, the interview consisted of bringing a newspaper article and talking about it bla bla bla. It was hell scary but i got in anyway due to my sister's help :)

Unfortunately, once i got in, i realised one small detail that was revealed a little later on. That i have to have leadership points in my testimonial or i will not get the SPOT cert that says i was a part of it once before. SOOOOOO i have to have a CCA that brings me to to leadership potential WHICH leads me to the 2 CCAs commitment that i have now. Funny my life seems to be circled around "whatever i want, i eventually get"

Really! The moment i realised i needed something, opportunities immediately opened up. Like the moment that announcement came to me that i had to have leadership points, 2 weeks later, announcements from my two CCAs told me about an opening for their subcommittes (being in sub committees get you Leadership points, being in the main committee gets you more) which i applied into. I got into both.

Then i searched for community service opportunities which is easy to find... Sooner than later, i'm gonna get what i need. The perfect testimonial. Still, there are many obstacles which even thinking about it makes me tired and want to go to sleep (i feel sleepy whenever i'm stress so you must understand my torture during exam periods).  One of the obstacles is about Leadership.

I need to be able to up my leadership skills or i'm going down with my testimonial right behind me.