The Age of Penmanship

As the blog title suggests, I did something interesting yesterday: Practicing my penmanship or rather, learning how to do Western Calligraphy!

Above is an example of my Before and After handwritings. It may not be that impressive but it IS something ^^

#normal day

Bus Stop Anology

Walking down the wet cobbled path that has been ever so familiar to me in the past few weeks that i started my internship, I stopped at my usual spot at the bus stop and drew in a deep breath. To which, as I normally do, started thinking up the many reasons why I should feel positive despite the ever gloomy outlook I've been having.

After a few seconds, i snapped out of my reverie, remembering that i was waiting for my bus and looked down the road to see if it had turned around the corner yet.

And that was when i saw it.

How everybody was doing the same thing. Looking down the road for their buses. Glancing down at their own distractions i.e. phones or newspapers before ultimately looking back up. And i wondered. Isn't this how love work sometimes? Or actually, always?

Take for example the fact that we look up so many times in a minute to see if the bus we're waiting to board has arrived yet. Isn't that what we always do? Not the every minute part of course. Without noticing it, we are always looking around for that one person to hopefully, spend the rest of our lives with. 

How about the the people who take forever before looking up from their phones or book and end up missing their bus. I call that missing the right guy or sacrificing the chance in meeting him/her because they have been so caught up in life.

And what about those who are distracted but at the last minute, were able to catch the bus? Well, I call them the bitches who stumbled upon love so easily. 

And then there are the romantics... or maybe the desperate ones. Who always keep looking down that road. Waiting for the bus that is always going to take a while before arriving at the destination or at the right time it was supposed to. The people who have been anxiously searching when they should have just let nature take it's course.

I'm not even halfway through! What happens to those at the wrong bus stops? waiting for the wrong buses? 

It became an endless question in my mind.

And how about the category i am under?

Then I knew... or decided (either one, I don't care). That I'm not in any of what i thought above. Because I'm not the one waiting for the bus. 

I'm the one in it. 

I'm going to be that girl that one wonderful, hopelessly funny guy out there is waiting for. And when he climbs on board and see me (and vice versa), something in us will just click... and we'll know for sure.

Because I believe in that kind of love.

Negative People

Some people have such low self esteem that they try to bring people down to their level and make them feel the same way. If someone they know seem to have something good happening in their life, something within themselves will prompt them to shoot you out of the sky.

The trick to handling these people, in my opinion, is to just let them be. You can't let them get to you, don't let them unnerve you, because if you do, they'd see that they've achieved their goal. 

Toxic people will pollute everything around them. Don't hesitate. Fumigate.

It's your choice, your decision to let their opinions affect you. Their thoughts or remarks don't matter and they never will as long as you stand strong and firm. 

Once, I've had a friend who would criticise everything I wore. "You sure you want to wear that," "Wow *laughs* that's so ugly." I've never gotten the end of it. She would even pick at my every mannerism. And I'm not the only target of her 'abuse'. At the end of my school year, my friend and I cut ties with her. It was the best decision I've ever made. It certainly has made me a happier person.

Now, another has come along. I've never been the kind to burn bridges so I've actually been keeping my distance. Because there's only so much I can take of her. 

7 things negative people will do to you. They will... 

1. Demean your value;

2. Destroy your image

3. Drive you crazily

4. Dispose your dreams

5. Discredit your imagination

6. Deframe your abilities

7. Disbelieve your opinions

If someone in your life has more than 4 of the above, you need to get rid of her/him. They're not worth your time and energy. The only thing that would become of you, is tired mentally and physically. 

That girl in my life has tried to bring me down many times and my other friend would most times, back me up. For example, there was a time when I wanted to try out Mixed Martial Arts course and she kept on nagging that I'm not the type to be in this course. She went on to give a few nonsensical reasons as to why I shouldn't join. I couldn't be bothered and was actually zoning out the whole time. But my other friend suddenly said, "Why are you trying to tell her she can't do something? If she wants to, she should try it out for herself what!" I was shocked, happily though because I could see the epicness on her face haha

Another time I mentioned that I wanted to travel to Australia, go on a solo trip or with my friend. Then she jumped in and said, "You're not the kind to go travelling alone one! You see that time...." She went on and on. Until, of course, I couldn't take it. You can talk about anything you want, but do not discredit my passion to travel. I started rambling off and in a sense, snapped, saying that she doesn't know me no matter how much she think she does. 

There are many other things but I'll just end here because you've got the gist I believe.

One day, I'll be able to let go like I've done with the old ex-friend. It's just a matter of time even though I do not really want to. I just want to give this friendship a last try.

Have you ever wondered about the people who have been to thousands of places they say they went to? Oh, Europe is my first home and New Zealand is my second. India is beautiful. Oh you know what you should do? You should take the bus from Bangkok then when you reach there, take the...

Bla Bla Bla, I never got the end of these things. When one guy goes, another comes in and say the almost exact same things. 

It's like they have no empathy for the people who have never been there and probably never will. Call it gloating, asshole or simply ridiculously proud of oneself but that is not how one should live.

Yes, they can be great conversation starters but you need to know where to draw the line. There is a difference between being philosophical or a travel lover from being a gloating attention seeker. 

Bucket List

Recently, i've read an article about an interview with Yasmine Khater, a double degree holder who has rubbed shoulders with presidents and is the founder of Transpiral- an organisation that helps women take their businesses to the next level.

One thing she said has inspired me to do what i am about to say:

When i first found out my dad was sick, the first questions i asked him were "what do you want to do?" "where do you want to go?" I was very naive, I felt like he had to make the most of the time he had left. But when he told me "I had done it all". that was a big thing to me and it was so empowering that it prompted me to write a bucket list.

And so here is my bucket list...

1. Attend a Taylor Swift concert
2. Visit Australia
3. Be an Air Stewardess for a while
4. Travel to America
5. Learn to swim (took a swimming course from June to August 2014 which lasted 12 lessons)
6. Get certified as a lifeguard
7. Learn sign language (learning as of Sept 2014)
8. Find out about Phantom of the Opera
9. Attend a Phantom of the Opera play
10. Take part in a dancing class
11. Tandem Sky Dive
12. Bungee Jump at the Macau Tower
13. Try out rock climbing  (achieved 2 Sept @LEAP Camp Ipoh)
14. Try out a forest adventure (achieved 2 Sept@ LEAP Camp Ipoh)
15. Try out a second time at a forest adventure this time in Singapore (as it seems more thrilling) without crying
16. Help out at an animal shelter
17. Learn Conversational French
18. Learn Japanese
19. Learn Korean  (I learnt the alphabets and minor words in the course i took, I've had enough)
20. Master Mandarin Chinese
21. Speak conversational Malay (learning as of August 2014 in Malay for Beginners course)
22. Work in a cruise
23. Be the object being painted in a nude painting
24. Learn Pottery 
25. Own a Dog
26. Take part in a Wildlife Rescue Mission
27. Learn First Aid- especially CPR
28. Visit South Korea (done July 2014)
29. Learn to play the trumpet
30. Learn to play the piano

Diabolik Lovers

Currently, i'm watching this awesome new anime called 'Diabolik Lovers.' It's about this girl (who is kinda plain looking compared to other female leads of other anime dramas) who stumbles upon the home/castle of vampire brothers. She was apparently sent there by her father who turned out to not be related to her by blood. 

Soon, each guy starts to sink their teeth into her because she smells so delectable and they can't seem to resist themselves. The mystery starts to begin when some new and mysterious guy says she is about to be 'awakened.'

Of all the brothers, my favourite is Shuu. He is soo handsome and cool and every time he comes onto my computer screen, I feel like touching and running my fingers through his tousled hair. He's the man for me if he ever existed.

HOW CAN YOU SAY NO TO THIS?

To My Dearest Teacher

Here's a poem to you

from a soft spoken fan

a moment of truth

something something jam

Well, as you can see

I've nought a skill

this literature dream

all but a thrill

But I'm putting my heart

to this so called poem

So then let us kickstart

this poetic moment

I will begin first 

with a hundred thank yous

for this and all the times

words you emphasised not to misuse

Much beyond that

you've nurtured and managed

students weak and strong

to embrace this language

So once and for all

I'm eternally grateful

for you were the one

who brought the fun to school

My Life's a Drama

"How dare you slap me. You, a big oaf of a man just slapped a lady! What kind of person are you!" Clutching my cheek, my wide eyes glared straight at the marbled wall. Yes, a wall. I was just acting. In my bathroom. I've been doing this 'acting' since secondary school, thinking up different scenarios where i pretend i was the female lead and just going with the flow. I don't know why but whenever i enter my bathroom, it becomes my stage, because it becomes a world of my own. And in my world... I'm an actress.

One time, i was a girl who just received the news that her boyfriend died in a war and i would act out the part of the devastated lady. I would cry within seconds because i just delve into my character.

Sometimes, i was a martial artist and would save a girl from getting beat up by her gangster boyfriend.

Other times, okay most times, i'm a graceful ballerina who met a k-pop dancer and fell in love. 

I love to act, i have no idea why but if someone were to give me a role, i'd act it out to my heart's content. I'd take as many takes if i have to because acting is just so fun, it's definitely not something i would tire of. 

I wish one day i'd get to take part in some acting class, just for the heck of it.

New Curiosity

Tell me something i don't know. Like seriously, i may probably know it already. If not, my eyes will be glued to your mouth as you tell me your story.

I confess, i'm a closet nerd. Okay maybe i already look the part (sometimes i don't of course). I love to read books, fiction or not. I love watching documentaries and i love finding more about the world. There's much so soak in and there's just too little time.

These days, i'm reading about art pieces like famous paintings... paintings people recognise instantly or have some vague recollection of it but somehow can't place where they've seen them. 

For example, Gustav Klimt. Don't know who that is? Maybe this painting might jog your memory:

I love this painting and what it represents <3 How the two have different patterned clothing but can somehow blend in beautifully, much like how love works~

Which is why i just borrowed a book about Gustav Klimt, his life and paintings. Can't wait to delve into the book. 

This post is a little out of the norm for me because i usually write about more descriptive life changing moments. But just for this post and maybe a few more to come, i'd like to talk about other small but still significant things i do.

XOXO

Emilia/C.Y

A Diary Post

This week alone, I’ve met up with a couple of fantastic friends that I haven’t met in quite a while. On Wednesday, 11th Sept, Jin Yin and I went to the Busking Festival at Sentosa, it was pretty fun though not as hyped up as I expected it to be. There was the leaning statue guy who moved whenever you gave a tip. Then, there was a performance by a fire performing duo followed by an act by a contortionist. It was mind blowing to say the least. In the end, Jin Yin and I just sat down somewhere and chatted, it was a great night =)

Then, the following day, I had to get to work : (

Anyways, on Friday, 13th Sept (TGIF), I met up with my secondary school buddies! Wee Ting, Zhi Yi and Zi Ying :D It was great to see them again, really missed having my old friends around~~

After that, on the Sat, 14th Sept, I met up with a couple of Foundation LEAP Camp friends, especially Isaac, he’s such a FUNNY guy.

Soon, I’m meeting up with LEAP camp friends again on 21st to go to Wild Wild Wet and 22nd with my best buddie, Vernon, to an awesome museum which I can’t wait to go to ^^

There’s still some more friends I wanna meet like Jasmine my BFF and Chloe, Joeslyn and Lina, my Poly BUDs! <3

I miss having my friends around when I’m in work all the time =_= hahaha

My Impending Doom

I feel trapped

awaiting death

my soul sapped

till my last breath

For once...

the future i fear

For once

my doom is near

Soon or later

my mistake will reveal

more later than never

to suffer an ordeal

Taking a LEAP of Faith

Hurdle Before the Journey

5 months and 19 days passport validity period. That fact just bored into me when i found out there was a compulsory 6 months validity period if you need to travel overseas. My passport was left with less than that. Breaking out in cold sweat, I turned to my friends, Chloe and Joeslyn, who were with me in the overseas camp briefing room, "SHIT! I didn't know it was this serious! What should i do?"

Squinting her eyes at me, Chloe, who knew that i was aware of that fact 2 months ago and still refused to renew my passport because i was lazy, said "You see! Why didn't you renew it sooner? I think you should ask the people in charge if still can use not." 

I pushed myself off my comfy seat and walked in the lecturers' general direction, braving myself for the worst. I approached a lady called Yvonne and explained to her the situation. After she got over the shock that she overlooked that tiny fact, she told me to call the Immigration & Checkpoint Authority of Singapore (ICA) and ask if the passport could be applied as soon as possible because the trip was in 2 days. I called them and they told me to bring along a set of documents and come by the next morning to arrange everything. YEAH!

It was so close! I was so relieved because the usual period to produce passports was 1 week and ICA only accepted my application because of the rush.

and like this, my Ipoh LEAP Camp trip officially begun...

Just LEAP

LEAP to the SP students who went to Earth Camp is a Leadership Development Program that helps the students themselves, including yours truly, to acquire knowledge of team management which comprises of mentoring and conflict management.

For me though, i just wanted to try the High Elements and White Water Rafting. Those were my purpose of attending the camp in the first place. Little did i know that there was so much more in store for me.

But first, let's talk about Earth Camp. This camp was interesting in a way where everything there uses recycled materials. Take for example the showering cubicles...

The black cylindrical things? They were originally water tanks and the shower heads uses non-heated water. It's not as dirty as you'd think, i thought it was a refreshing change of environment. I was only a bit bothered on the first day because the doors were particularly small for my height (1.72m) so i had to always remember to lift my leg up over the raised flooring to prevent myself from falling head first into that concrete floor.

To sum things up, Earth Camp was beautiful in its own way, there was fresh air constantly that rejuvenates you instantly. The only bad thing was the bunk beds in the dorm rooms. It was sooooo UNCOMFORTABLE. Whenever you turn in your sleep, the metal bunk beds make an irritating squeaking noise. I only wished that i could sleep in the tree houses where the two lecturers were in for the 3 to 4 days we were in Earth Camp.

The Treehouses

LET THE BEFRIENDING BEGIN!

Group 1. "I'm in Group 1," I repeated, i could feel myself starting to dread the 4 days of camp. I was going to be alone whereas my 2 best buds would be in group 2. To say i was sad would be an understatement. I was looking forward to hanging out with them and have the best times of our 3rd year but instead i was separated from the both of them and had to go through the camp alone. Well, that was what i thought. 

Over the course of the 4 days, i made connections with FABULOUS people i'm proud to call my friends. I had such a fantastic time with them that i couldn't bear to let go on the last day. And by friends, i mean my group 1 mates. Although i wish i could have had more time to get to know everybody, i'm grateful for the time we got to spend together.

 

My awesome group mates include Alex (who is in my opinion, extremely wise and is a fantastic leader), Joey (very outgoing and caring), Jin Yin (cute petite girl), Amanda (awesome leader, is extremely talented and very pretty), Hui Xin (cool gal), Kristle (determined and brave), Yong Siang (nice guy with mega watt smile), Darrel (gentleman and has potential to be a great leader), Wei Ming (approachable and nice guy), Harrison (hilarious to the core!), Zheng Xun (nice guy) and Dylan (mei nan looking and is extremely approachable and a gentleman). 

At first i was pretty shy until the morning of the 2nd or 3rd day (I can't remember) at Ipoh camp together where i became more open and a lil more my normal self- which is kinda crazy hahaha. From then on, i started to bond with the girls and a few of the guys. By the last day, i couldn't bear not to hang out with them because they're just such an awesome bunch of people to be with. Especially on the bus ride home when i started murmuring a song i heard a few years ago "I know that we will all be friends~~~" 

Jin Yin who was next to me at the time laughed, "You sound so sad!"

You're a Gem

The last activity of the camp before we departed for Singapore was called 'You're a Gem to me because...' The activity was that everyone had to give someone a shiny pebble (which is provided by the facilitators) to someone they thought who deserved it, who they think are a gem to them. They would have to tell them why they deserved the gem and could give to as many people as they want, it's limitless. By the end of the activity, many people were sobbing like crazy, especially me. 

Many told me i was a gem to them because i'm very cheerful, crazy and funny, that i brought life to the group. Someone also told me i was the girl version of Harrison (the funny guy in the group). I was speechless. I really was. To be honest, I never saw myself as funny and lively. I've always thought of myself as the dull girl who is always quiet. So thank you to the friends who made me realise that i brought something special to the bonding moments haha, TANKS TANKS!!!

Another unforgettable thing was that Alex told me that he learnt something from me and what he said from there really shook me..  "although you don't establish many brief relationships with people in this camp like those from other groups, you make deep strong meaningful relationships with the girls within our group. In a way, that's really meaningful because a bundle of sticks together is stronger than many sticks all spread out."

Alex is in my opinion, very wise and humble, i learnt so much from him, how to be a leader and many others.

I don't regret going for this camp even though i came home much tanner than already am. The gem activity and all the other moments are what i will never forget like those who encouraged me during the high elements when i was terrified of the obstacles, those who were concerned for me with i hurt myself with the crazy huge-ass real rocks-climbing, those who laughed at my jokes, those times when Harrison made everybody laugh until their stomach hurt, those times when Amanda teased me about the type of guys i like, those short refreshing conversations i had with Chloe and Joeslyn in the dorm next door every night and many many more. These are moments i would never trade for anything else in the world. THANK YOU UNIVERSE, FOR MAKING THIS HAPPEN. I've always believed that things happened for a reason and the reason why i wasn't in Chloe and Joeslyn's group was because i was meant to meet the fantastic, beautiful people of group 1.

92 Truths About Myself

So there was a new update in my Facebook feed on 92 truths about yourself so i decided to join in the fun!

WHAT WAS YOUR:

1. last beverage = Milo

2. last phone call = Home

3. last text message = Melanie

4. last song you listened to = Greased Lightning

5. last time you cried = Yesterday when i had to say goodbye to friends in camp

EVER:

6. dated someone twice = No.

7. been cheated on= No.

8. kissed someone & regretted it = No.

9. lost someone special = Yes.

10. been depressed = Yes

11. been drunk and threw up = No.

LIST THREE FAVORITE COLORS:

12. WHITE

13. PINK

14. RED

LAST YEAR (2012), HAVE YOU:

15. Made a new friend = Yes

16. Fallen out of love = Yes

17. Laughed until you cried = Yesh!

18. Met someone who changed you = Yes :)

19. Found out who your true friends were = Yeah

20. Found out someone was talking about you= Yeah

21. Kissed anyone on your FB friend's list = Yes (family la!)

GENERAL:

22. How many people on your FB friends list do you know in real life = Most

24. Do you have any pets = Not really

25. Do you want to change your name = No, i want to add an extra name to my existing one, EMILIA!

26. What did you do for your last birthday = SHOPPING!

27. What time did you wake up today = 7.30 am

28. What were you doing at midnight last night = surfing the net. 

29. Name something you CANNOT wait for = Graduation.

30. Last time you saw your Mother = In the morning

31. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life = can form my words more eloquently 

32. What are you listening to right now = nothing.. 

33. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom= Nope

34. What's getting on your nerves right now = Sound of an irritating motors driving on the road outside my window

35. Most visited webpage = Facebook

37. Nickname = Ria

38. Relationship Status = Single.

39. Zodiac sign = Virgo

40. He or She = I'm a She. I want a He.

41. Elementary = Bukit Panjang 

42. High School = Teck Whye Sec 

43. College = SP

44. Hair color = Jet Black

45. Long or short= Short

46. Height = 1.72.

47. Do you have a crush on someone?=  Of course!

48. What do you like about yourself? = My height

49. Piercings = Ear pierced only

50. Tattoos= Never. 

51. Righty or lefty= Righty 

FIRSTS :

52. First surgery= None. 

53. First piercing = 14

54. First best friend = Don't remember. 

55. First sport you joined = Swimming

56. First vacation = Indonesia

57. MIA.

58. First pair of trainers = Don't know.

RIGHT NOW:

59. Eating = Germs. 

60. Drinking = Saliva.

61. I'm about to = answer this question and the next and the next and the next... 

62. Listening to = None. 

63. Waiting for = myself to feel bored and sleepy. 

YOUR FUTURE :

64. Want kids? Probably. 

65. Get Married? Yes.

66. Career? Something i'd love 

WHICH IS BETTER :

67. Lips or eyes = Eyes.

68. Hugs or kisses= Hugs. 

69.Shorter or taller = Taller.

70. Older or Younger = Older.

71. Romantic or spontaneous = Both. 

72. Nice stomach or nice arms = Arms. 

73. Sensitive or loud = Sensitive.

74. Hook-up or relationship = R/s.

75. Trouble maker or hesitant = If you're referring to me then I AM A TROUBLE MAKER!! BWA HA HA

HAVE YOU EVER :

76. Kissed a stranger = Nope.

77. Drank hard liquor = No. 

78. Lost glasses/contacts = No

79. Sex on first date = No.

80. Broke someone's heart = No.

81. Had your own heart broken = Yes

82. Been arrested= No.

83. Turned someone down = Yes.  

84. Cried when someone died = Yes. 

85. Fallen for a friend = once and it was a long time ago

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

86. Yourself =Most times

87. Miracles = No

88. Love at first sight = No, rather, lust at first sight

89. Heaven = Probably. 

90. Santa Claus = When I watch X'MAS movies.  

91. Kiss on the first date: Yes

92. Angels: No

A Perfect 10

"Let yourself move to the next chapter in life when the time comes, don't remain stuck on the same page."

Counting Down

10 days. It's exactly 10 days before my internship begins. An acquaintance of mine actually counted the total number of days the internship will last so that it'd give him a sort of countdown. 

He said it was about 5 months and a few extra days. When i first heard that, i actually threw my head back in laughter. I couldn't believe he spent his precious time just trying to count how many days of work he had to carry out. I could tell though, that he wasn't at all looking forward to his internship period, more like dreading them. 

As for me, i'm not sure how i feel. All i know is that i love the place i am going to intern in. The place is actually pretty nice, the people are friendly, the boss is friendly but also wise and serious. The location is pretty good, i actually have a direct bus home from work. The salary is also satisfactory. I couldn't think of anyplace better to be interning in. 

I'm pretty sure shit would get thrown here or there somehow but i know i'll be able to learn a thing or two. Besides, i have a good supervisor leading me, i guess i should be in good hands. 

Change

"Just 4 more semestral exams to go before i don't have to take one anymore. Just 4 more and I'm free!" I told myself back in 2011 when i was a year 1 student in Singapore Polytechnic. Back then, i, like every other student, was trying to cram every single information from our notes to prepare ourselves for the end of semester examination. So to make myself feel better, i counted down every semester of how many examinations i had left to go through before i finally graduate and didn't have to take them anymore. 

Now that everything is finally over, i'm starting to feel anxious as each day pass. I guess i might feel this way because i don't know what to expect. Because it's a new change. I'm changing into a different gear and i don't know how i should begin.

Change is definitely a scary thing. Nobody likes them. And in my dictionary, there are 2 reasons why:

Comfort

Where we are now, the routine things we do everyday brings a little consistency in our lives. Even if it may not be healthy or enjoyable, these are things we are familiar with, putting ourselves in our own little comfort zones. And people inevitably try to avoid being in uncomfortable situations.

Fear

For many people, change represents the unknown and that is scary. Take someone i know for example, we'll call her Lyanne. Lyanne wanted to be a teacher so she applied to be one from the Ministry of Education (MOE), unfortunately, she fumbled in her interview and didn't get a place. A year later, she tried again. This time she practiced long and hard for the interview, 110% sure her passion in this arena would be seen by her panel of interviewers. Unfortunately, 3 months later, she received via email that she had been rejected. Lyanne told me she had no idea what she should do. "I had always wanted to be a teacher, now, i don't know where else i should go..." trying to keep her tears in.

It was a new change. She had reached a road block and she needed to shift gears but all she was doing was standing there desperately waiting for the wall to crumble down by itself. Of many things i have learnt in life, there is one important one. There are many paths that reach the same destination. "The MOE may not be your only route to your passion, there's so many other opportunities, you just have to take a look around and see it for yourself," patting her back, trying to comfort her.

A few weeks later, she initiated a bond with the child care centre she was working. In the agreement, she will be able to take a child care diploma course in the afternoon which would be paid entirely by the child care centre and in the morning, help out at the centre. Afterwards, she would be bonded with the centre for 3.5 years. Her road ahead may be difficult but at the very least, she is doing what she loves.

So i guess what i'm trying to say is, don't be afraid of change, things happen for a reason and even though the reason may hurt, it'll all turn out okay in the end. 

Moving On to a New Phase

So here's the big one, even though i'm going to be terrified of going in to my new workplace, meet and make new friends who would be so many years my senior, i'm going to give it my all. This change would be for the best because as cliche as it sounds, "What doesn't kill you will only make you stronger."

So here's a song to end this post~

A Change Would Do You Good

Singleton

I do a great job at being single, actually very experienced in that field. Now that i'm almost going to reach the big 2-0 in a few days, the fear of never having someone special on my side gnawed me. Sometimes when i'm just taking a stroll outside or at the shopping mall and see a couple being even remotely romantic, i'd give a mental f**k you.

I just don't get it. Sometimes you'd see a not so pretty girl with a hot guy or an average guy with a hot girl and it just makes you wonder, "What the hell happened that got them together?" I just don't get it! What IS their secret?

There was one time when i thought if i should have standards on who i want as a boyfriend but then i re-analysed that and decided, to heck with that! We're choosing someone who would be our partner for the rest of our lives, i think we have a right to be picky. We shouldn't settle for someone we have no special feelings for because both parties would just end up miserable, leading to slow and painful death for the relationship. For example, my friend, Wendy, finally relented and started going out with a guy who kept chasing her for almost 3 months. Fortunately, it lasted only an excruciating 2 or 3 weeks because she didn't really feel comfortable being just alone with him. Every time they went on a date, she'd bring along another friend. AWKWARD. The way i saw it was she went out with him because she wanted a boyfriend since she never had one before. And the both of them ended up no longer being friends. Sad isn't it?

As for me, you can say i had my share of experiences but it's nothing actually. My first confession was at my secondary school canteen. It was after physical education and i sat down on a bench with 2 other girls and one guy from my class. We started chatting and just as i was drinking from a bottle, the guy blurted out to me to be his girlfriend. And i choked on the water. The other two girls just stared at him. I wiped myself off and asked him to repeat what he said but he just kept quiet. Oh well..

My second confession was by a stranger and it was weird. Click here for the story but scroll to the fifth point on 'romance'.

Then there were times when it wasn't a confession but things that led up to one. I had 4 and i sorely wished that i liked at least one because they are all really nice guys but just weren't for me.

Guy 1: Texted me good morning and asked me how my day was every day until it started getting creepy. And how do i know how my day was when it hasn't even started yet?
Guy 2: Asked me out to lunch every Wednesday of the week without fail despite telling him i had something on every Wednesday.
Guy 3: Played 'Love Story' on the guitar for me one night when we were studying together and walked me home. Texted me a lot of times.
Guy 4: A good friend who i know likes me but never confessed because he knew i'd turn him down

I actually liked guy 3 for a while but he never confessed or anything no matter how many hints i gave him until i eventually gave up. Months later, my guy friend of mine told me guy 3 definitely liked me but was probably shy which was why he didn't make a big gesture or anything. But the moment had passed...

You know what, I think i'd do a fantastic job at being a girlfriend! I love to read books, watch action movies and romantic comedies, i love the great outdoors, take me bungee jumping and i'll say "WHEN?" I love trying new things and i actually don't mind if my would-be-boyfriend told me he watches porn sometimes. Because, come on, which guy doesn't? There's so many great things about me, so CUPID, come on!!! Give me a great guy already! It's not like i'm asking for much, just handsome, faithful, tall, humorous, loves to watch movies and must also like reading books so when we have a vacation by the beach, we'd just sit next to each other with our legs intertwined while we read our books. ALSO, he must loove trying new things with me like tango, art class or tandem skydiving. CUPID, ARE YOU COPYING ALL THIS DOWN?

Ok, maybe i have a short temper but that's just a small issue :)

Green Eyed

A friend of mine is going to Taiwan with her friend soon and it'd be a twin solo trip, not taking part in any form of packaged tour. To be honest, i'm jealous because i also want to go somewhere with my best friend. We had actually decided to go to Thailand but no plans is underway at the moment and I fear she might end up saying she don't want to go there in the end. 

And to be even more honest, i'm actually pretty mad at myself because i told myself that i wanted to take a solo trip to Australia but haven't even started on any plans yet. All i've been doing in the past month or so is accumulate brochures about Australia and piling them up on my study table. I told myself that i wanted to get up and start planning this solo trip but i'm actually afraid to. I'm afraid to take the first step...

Any marriage is built and shaped by two different, sinful people adjusting to one another. You simply will never find a human being who is pre-packaged to fit your every personality quirk, cultural preference or lifestyle particularity. Every couple will have differences and will need to make adjustments for one another. No one will ever be everything you want, but there’s probably more than one person who has the basics in common with you and would make for a great marriage. And here’s the best part: the more work you and your spouse are willing to put into your marriage, the more joyful it will be.

-Relevant Mag

What I Miss About The Old Days

I just saw a post on Facebook from 90s Babies Only page and it instantaneously made me miss my childhood. How much fun the old times was and how funny that we thought our life back then was so difficult when it was actually the most easiest and freest period of our length of time in this world. When the world still revolved around us. When people we know or love still haven't passed on yet. When we were still innocent and viewed the world in rose tinted glasses. When we loved everything and everyone 101%, welcoming new things with open arms, always taking that jump without hesitating and never doubting or consider what would happen next. We were fearless.

And the best things about my childhood? The games and the TV shows. i gotta say, my childhood would have been dull without them all. Thank you for the wonderful times life (yes i'm referring to life as a third person).

The PowerPuff Girls

The Berenstain Bears

From top left going clockwise: Sailormoon, Garfield, (i don't know the next one), Doraemon, Cardcaptor Sakura and Detective Conan.

Wild Thornberry

Lizzie Mcguire

The Magic School Bus

Bubu Cha Cha

Recess

Scooby Doo

Arthur

Bear in Big Blue House

Totally Spies

Lazy Town

As Told By Ginger

Bananas in Pyjamas

Rocket Power

Braceface

Sabrina

Tom and Jerry

Mighty Morphin Power Rangers

Power Rangers Galaxy

Thank you for all the shows/movies, whoever the creators of them all are :')