Lost

I think that everyone gets lost some time in their lives, whether they're in their forties or in their twenties. There always come a time when you stop and ask yourself what you really want to do with your life. A few of us get that epiphanies we're all waiting for though.

I have always thought and desired that I would one day have a job I love, that I would not stress day and night for. That even if i get burned out from all the endless energy that requires of me for the job, I would still say, "Hey, I love my job and that's all that counts!"

I've met many people in my 20 years of living on earth: a bus accident/crash survivor, an ex deep sea diver, a guy who used to race motorcycles with others dead in the night even when it was dangerous and could cause lives (luckily no one got hurt) et cetera... and I don't believe that they regretted any of the steps they took in their 'journey,' the good and the bad.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that sometimes, your dreams may not lead you down the paths you would have thought and the paths you're going to take may actually lead you to where you'll ultimately love to be. Life is full of screw ups, full of possibilities as well as ups and downs but it will always bring you to where you're supposed to be. Because if it's meant to be, it will be.

And one day, you won't regret that step you took.

Growing Up

In the internship that has passed 2 weeks ago, I've learnt a couple of things that has opened my eyes to so much more.

Number 1, money. I realised that it will never be enough no matter how much you earn, no matter how much you spend. One time or another, something bad will crop up and you would need to spend money you didn't want to in the first place. In other words, saving for a rainy day. 2 weeks ago, a tooth at the back of my mouth began to hurt really bad till the point where i wanted to cry so badly. I rushed to the dentist and she chided me about not having a regular dental checkup. My dad ended up spending over $250 to solve the problem and I can't even eat solid food right now. Pathetic right?

Moving on, I've learnt my lessons:
- Prevention is always always better than cure
- Have a dental checkup every 6 months
- Save for rainy days

Money is important and I'm not going to waste it on material things too often from now on.


Number 2, Courage. This isn't about being able to catch that creepy lizard or touch that cat, it's about being able to face the day with a positive mind. There are so many things in life that will bring you down, people who can't stop scolding or chiding you for whether it is your fault or not etc. etc. etc. You just need to make sure you're not going to lose that innocence or sense of good in life. Do not let anything take you down and remember that compared to all the disasters and tragedies in life, your problem is much easier to solve. You will ultimately become less stressed.


Number 3. People will hate you. You may be the reddest most juiciest apple in the world and there will still be people who hates apples. The only reason people do this to others is because they're afraid of something we have. And also that they don't know us. It's easy to hurt people when you don't know them. Which is why I've made a point to remember that each person has their own story to tell and the reason they turned out the way they were. Just like how serial killers were never born with the natural intent to kill, most of the time, it's the tough childhood to blame.


Number 4. Look Pretty. That's the most important thing. Countless studies and most basest observation has shown that attractive people tend to get more out of life. Like how parents tend to give in to their more attractive children, how the handsome people get paid more than average looking people, how we tend to see attractive people as friendly and approachable. Being pretty gives you an edge, a second look, sometimes a second chance.


Number 5. Always be alert to your surroundings. Because you tend to lose out more when you don't. For example, my colleague once checked in at a hotel where she was supposed to stay at for the next 3 days. On her second night back to the hotel after a long day of sightseeing, the receptionist said to her, "hi mdm! Here is your key, I hope your day was a pleasant one!" Turned out that the receptionist made an effort to remember her. This may not probably be the best example to explain this point but I am sure you got the gist. Which is to be observant to everything.

So there you go, the few things I've learnt from my internship~~

Clock is ticking

i don't mean my body clock but by my future. The clock is ticking and i haven't found a university I wanted to enrol in yet. 

I only know 2 things:

1. I want to travel for my job

2. My passions include drama and the arts

That's basically it. So i have been searching degrees or double degrees or whatever comes into my interest while surfing potential universities' websites. 

I did come across one private university in Singapore and its world ranking is among the 300s compared to Singapore Local universities which are in a much higher standing. So i asked my sister for her honest opinion and here is what she said:

"Your GPA is very good, why do you want to go to a lousy university?'

Because there is nothing in the local universities that interest me at all. And now I'm also deliberating on what she said, 'why go to a lousy university?"

She did add that i should try out for a scholarship. Well, I can try but i have no idea where to start >,<

OH MYYYYY GAWD, THINKING ABOUT THE FUTURE IS SO STRESSFUL AND FREAKING FRUSTRATING!!!!

Looking Back at 2013

2013 to say the least, wasn't the best year of my life but still, it was full of surprises and new experiences, especially NEW FRIENDS! <3

And to sum them up, I'm gonna put up a photo montage hehe..

It was the year I became much closer to the wonderful girls in my clique <3

Where I explored deeper into the world of photography

Volunteered in Cambodia which honestly, had been one of the best things that happened in 2013 because..

I met this bunch of people :')

Made many new friends

while mocking them at the same time hahaha

My favourite kid <3

Besides going to Cambodia where all this magic happened,

I also went to .....

a musical for the first time: Adams Family!!!!

It was the most awesome musical i've ever been to!!! "family first and family last!' (a song they sang)

Besides that, I've also went to Ipoh for the first time in my life!

And met a second bunch of crazy people

where i made friends with the craziest of them all (JINYIN) LOL. Who's to say i ain't the mad one here?

I also reconnected with old friends ^^

And made a new one in internship!

She's the nicest girl I've ever met!

So I couldn't say that 2013 was that bad to me, I have no regrets considering all this good that happened :D

 So please 2014, please be good to me :)

I'm such a nice girl afterall :)

The Age of Penmanship

As the blog title suggests, I did something interesting yesterday: Practicing my penmanship or rather, learning how to do Western Calligraphy!

Above is an example of my Before and After handwritings. It may not be that impressive but it IS something ^^

#normal day

Bus Stop Anology

Walking down the wet cobbled path that has been ever so familiar to me in the past few weeks that i started my internship, I stopped at my usual spot at the bus stop and drew in a deep breath. To which, as I normally do, started thinking up the many reasons why I should feel positive despite the ever gloomy outlook I've been having.

After a few seconds, i snapped out of my reverie, remembering that i was waiting for my bus and looked down the road to see if it had turned around the corner yet.

And that was when i saw it.

How everybody was doing the same thing. Looking down the road for their buses. Glancing down at their own distractions i.e. phones or newspapers before ultimately looking back up. And i wondered. Isn't this how love work sometimes? Or actually, always?

Take for example the fact that we look up so many times in a minute to see if the bus we're waiting to board has arrived yet. Isn't that what we always do? Not the every minute part of course. Without noticing it, we are always looking around for that one person to hopefully, spend the rest of our lives with. 

How about the the people who take forever before looking up from their phones or book and end up missing their bus. I call that missing the right guy or sacrificing the chance in meeting him/her because they have been so caught up in life.

And what about those who are distracted but at the last minute, were able to catch the bus? Well, I call them the bitches who stumbled upon love so easily. 

And then there are the romantics... or maybe the desperate ones. Who always keep looking down that road. Waiting for the bus that is always going to take a while before arriving at the destination or at the right time it was supposed to. The people who have been anxiously searching when they should have just let nature take it's course.

I'm not even halfway through! What happens to those at the wrong bus stops? waiting for the wrong buses? 

It became an endless question in my mind.

And how about the category i am under?

Then I knew... or decided (either one, I don't care). That I'm not in any of what i thought above. Because I'm not the one waiting for the bus. 

I'm the one in it. 

I'm going to be that girl that one wonderful, hopelessly funny guy out there is waiting for. And when he climbs on board and see me (and vice versa), something in us will just click... and we'll know for sure.

Because I believe in that kind of love.

Negative People

Some people have such low self esteem that they try to bring people down to their level and make them feel the same way. If someone they know seem to have something good happening in their life, something within themselves will prompt them to shoot you out of the sky.

The trick to handling these people, in my opinion, is to just let them be. You can't let them get to you, don't let them unnerve you, because if you do, they'd see that they've achieved their goal. 

Toxic people will pollute everything around them. Don't hesitate. Fumigate.

It's your choice, your decision to let their opinions affect you. Their thoughts or remarks don't matter and they never will as long as you stand strong and firm. 

Once, I've had a friend who would criticise everything I wore. "You sure you want to wear that," "Wow *laughs* that's so ugly." I've never gotten the end of it. She would even pick at my every mannerism. And I'm not the only target of her 'abuse'. At the end of my school year, my friend and I cut ties with her. It was the best decision I've ever made. It certainly has made me a happier person.

Now, another has come along. I've never been the kind to burn bridges so I've actually been keeping my distance. Because there's only so much I can take of her. 

7 things negative people will do to you. They will... 

1. Demean your value;

2. Destroy your image

3. Drive you crazily

4. Dispose your dreams

5. Discredit your imagination

6. Deframe your abilities

7. Disbelieve your opinions

If someone in your life has more than 4 of the above, you need to get rid of her/him. They're not worth your time and energy. The only thing that would become of you, is tired mentally and physically. 

That girl in my life has tried to bring me down many times and my other friend would most times, back me up. For example, there was a time when I wanted to try out Mixed Martial Arts course and she kept on nagging that I'm not the type to be in this course. She went on to give a few nonsensical reasons as to why I shouldn't join. I couldn't be bothered and was actually zoning out the whole time. But my other friend suddenly said, "Why are you trying to tell her she can't do something? If she wants to, she should try it out for herself what!" I was shocked, happily though because I could see the epicness on her face haha

Another time I mentioned that I wanted to travel to Australia, go on a solo trip or with my friend. Then she jumped in and said, "You're not the kind to go travelling alone one! You see that time...." She went on and on. Until, of course, I couldn't take it. You can talk about anything you want, but do not discredit my passion to travel. I started rambling off and in a sense, snapped, saying that she doesn't know me no matter how much she think she does. 

There are many other things but I'll just end here because you've got the gist I believe.

One day, I'll be able to let go like I've done with the old ex-friend. It's just a matter of time even though I do not really want to. I just want to give this friendship a last try.

Have you ever wondered about the people who have been to thousands of places they say they went to? Oh, Europe is my first home and New Zealand is my second. India is beautiful. Oh you know what you should do? You should take the bus from Bangkok then when you reach there, take the...

Bla Bla Bla, I never got the end of these things. When one guy goes, another comes in and say the almost exact same things. 

It's like they have no empathy for the people who have never been there and probably never will. Call it gloating, asshole or simply ridiculously proud of oneself but that is not how one should live.

Yes, they can be great conversation starters but you need to know where to draw the line. There is a difference between being philosophical or a travel lover from being a gloating attention seeker. 

Bucket List

Recently, i've read an article about an interview with Yasmine Khater, a double degree holder who has rubbed shoulders with presidents and is the founder of Transpiral- an organisation that helps women take their businesses to the next level.

One thing she said has inspired me to do what i am about to say:

When i first found out my dad was sick, the first questions i asked him were "what do you want to do?" "where do you want to go?" I was very naive, I felt like he had to make the most of the time he had left. But when he told me "I had done it all". that was a big thing to me and it was so empowering that it prompted me to write a bucket list.

And so here is my bucket list...

1. Attend a Taylor Swift concert
2. Visit Australia
3. Be an Air Stewardess for a while
4. Travel to America
5. Learn to swim (took a swimming course from June to August 2014 which lasted 12 lessons)
6. Get certified as a lifeguard
7. Learn sign language (learning as of Sept 2014)
8. Find out about Phantom of the Opera
9. Attend a Phantom of the Opera play
10. Take part in a dancing class
11. Tandem Sky Dive
12. Bungee Jump at the Macau Tower
13. Try out rock climbing  (achieved 2 Sept @LEAP Camp Ipoh)
14. Try out a forest adventure (achieved 2 Sept@ LEAP Camp Ipoh)
15. Try out a second time at a forest adventure this time in Singapore (as it seems more thrilling) without crying
16. Help out at an animal shelter
17. Learn Conversational French
18. Learn Japanese
19. Learn Korean  (I learnt the alphabets and minor words in the course i took, I've had enough)
20. Master Mandarin Chinese
21. Speak conversational Malay (learning as of August 2014 in Malay for Beginners course)
22. Work in a cruise
23. Be the object being painted in a nude painting
24. Learn Pottery 
25. Own a Dog
26. Take part in a Wildlife Rescue Mission
27. Learn First Aid- especially CPR
28. Visit South Korea (done July 2014)
29. Learn to play the trumpet
30. Learn to play the piano